Beyond heartbreak, what ‘hirap mong mahalin, UP’ really means for those who weren’t chosen?

Two words which can indicate two things: you passed, or you failed. 

Hearts pounded for a while as this year's batch of UP College Admission Test (UPCAT) takers opened their portal for the release of results.  

They were greeted by one of the two phrases: “Thank You…“ or “Congratulations…,” with the first may signify anxiety or heartbreak while the latter indicates either  pure bliss or relief. In the middle of anticipation — from all the sleepless nights and the cutthroat competition — a feeling of confounding love comes over them. 

Regardless of the outcome before them, a collective question looms over their heads: 

UP has always been a dream school for many, particularly to those who aspire to finish their study despite experiencing difficulties in terms of finances. For most young Filipinos, it is almost a destiny, an anchored fate placed upon their lives by peers, parents, mentors, or even a society that watches every step with expectations. Earning a place in this university is not merely about securing a slot in Asia’s top-performing public higher education institution; it is about seizing the opportunity to carry on a legacy — a story shaped by generations of heroes, artists, scientists, and leaders who dared to imagine a better nation. 

To be part of the UP Community is to lift the burden of struggles long endured, honor dreams once thought impossible, and bring light into the hopes passed down from one generation to the next. 

It is from these very hopes that the deep love for this institution emerges, a love that runs far deeper than its name or prestige. Behind every dream of entering the university lives another; it may be an old hope born from those who longed for a better life or simply an extinguished fire that still yearns to be lit up.  

Yet there are times when even the deepest love falls short. 

What initially began as a phrase among students of the UP System to describe the tumultuous and bittersweet experience of being a Iskolar ng Bayan, from chaotic enrollment seasons to spontaneous lightning rallies and relentless academic battles, has now found new life beyond the university’s walls. Today, it also captures another deeply emotional moment: the release of UPCAT results. 

As it came out on the 22nd day of April 2025, the love for UP was once tested. Ehla was one of the students who waited for their love to be reciprocated but ended up  with a heartbreak. What she had dreamed of for years was suddenly just out of reach — a reality that transformed her love for UP into a painful reminder of how hope and disappointment often go hand in hand. 

Ehla, 18, a Naga City Science High School graduate under the Science, Technology, Engineering, and Mathematics (STEM) strand, had long set her sights on studying at UP. For her, it was not just an option, rather, it was her only choice. She applied to several programs across  UP Los Baños and Diliman campuses, prioritizing Philosophy and Psychology as pathways toward the field of law.

Given that UP has consistently proven itself as a top-performing state university, “it was an ideal choice for someone like me who aims for quality education but struggles financially to afford private institutions,” Ehla shared. 

She had pinned her hopes on UP, believing that her love and effort would be enough to secure her place. But when the results came out, she was met not with an acceptance, but with a silent, heartbreaking rejection.

"It was devastating," she said. "When I saw the red 'Thank you!' on the portal, I felt hopeless. It was as if my mind had gone blank, trying to process where I would end up in college.” 

The heartbreak, however, ran deeper than just missing out on admission. As the results remain a shock, Ehla finds herself questioning not only her chances but the system itself. On the surface, the process did appear equal. 

"Every applicant undergoes the same application procedures and [took] standardized exams," she noted. Yet behind this identical treatment, deeper inequalities remained. 

For students from well-resourced schools, strong academic foundations and access to better preparatory programs became silent advantages. Meanwhile, students from underfunded schools, who relied most on the promise of state universities, often entered the competition already at a disadvantage. 

"Digging deeper, there is an inherent inequality," Ehla pointed out, highlighting how privilege often determines outcomes long before the UPCAT began.

“How can fairness be truly achieved if students do not begin on equal footing?” she asked, revealing the irony behind the processes.  

Certainly, students do not begin on equal footing, given that to pass UPCAT, there is already a predetermined result that comes from the early years of high school. 

Similar to how Madeline shared half of Ehla's heartbreak, she started quite ahead on her way to having UP within her grasp as she took and got accepted for the UPCAT 2024. 

“I believe the factor that got me accepted to the university boils down to my high school grades,” she admitted.

Madeline, 19, a Nursing student from Our Lady of Fatima University, Pampanga, recalled her experience of getting into UP with a program she did not prefer. Despite the acceptance, there was still heartbreak — a different kind, yet just as painful. She was not admitted into BS Nursing, the program she had truly wanted.

"Regardless, I let my dream of becoming a UP student take over me, and decided to give it a try," she said. But as time passed, she quickly realized that the program was not for her. The weight of her decision lingered heavily. 

"The idea of me not pursuing a passion that calls to me solely for the university’s prestige would forever haunt me,” she added.

These heartbreaks are only a glimpse of the countless dreams that UP has quietly broken. Over the years, many stories have passed, while thousands more remain untold. If not for students like Ehla and Madeline, one is left to wonder who UP truly belongs to.

It is undeniable that those who dared to apply and wish to study in UP must undergo a rigorous and highly selective process — UPCAT. For  UPCAT 2025, over 130,000 students applied for the limited slots to enter the university’s campuses. Each program offered by UP is deemed a “quota course,” with the number of available slots ranging from 40 to 200, depending on the campus and degree program. 

Over the years, the admission process has received criticism from the public due to the percentages of the passers from various educational and socio-economic backgrounds. During the pandemic, the removal of the UPCAT and introduction of the University of the Philippines College Admission (UPCA) — which used high school grades as one of the basis for admission —  saw an increase in the admission of private school students over those coming from public high schools. 

In 2023, it was reported that only 1 out of 5 UPCA passers were from public high schools. This raised concerns regarding equal access to free education, specifically since the university is a beneficiary of  Republic Act 10931 or the Universal Access to Quality Tertiary Education Act of 2017. 

With the return of the UPCAT in 2024, a more balanced playing field for the applicants has been established. It was reported that the estimated educational distribution of qualifiers were the following: 44% from private schools, 27% from science high schools, and 29% from general public high schools. The UPCAT 2025 results have different statistics compared to last year, with 55% of passers coming from public high schools and 45% coming from private schools. While this shows a higher percentage for those coming from public schools, a significant gap between those from private and public schools still remains. The disparity is also reflective of other factors to qualify for the admissions process. 

Beyond the exam itself, a student’s chances of passing include: the quality of their school’s grading system, the kind of institution they come from, and their economic status. High school grades account for 40% of the University Predicted Grade (UPG), meaning that advantages and disadvantages built years before the UPCAT results  carry heavy weight in the final decision. Access to quality education, review centers, private tutors, and even something as basic as time and space to study, all become invisible forces tilting the odds. 

Yuri, 18, a graduate of Quezon City Science High School and an UPCAT 2025 taker, experienced these challenges firsthand. 

“Actually, even though I come from QCSHS, a school primarily filled with the upper class and upper middle class, I don't come from wealth nor does my family have the connections and resources to spare by investing everything in me,” he shared. 

The gap was evident. “It demoralized me immensely when nearly every single one of my peers had their hands on numerous review centers and that ‘bluebook’ thing for practice, because it showed me just how horribly wide the gap of wealth creates despite the student’s own abilities and hardwork,” he added. 

Excellence alone, he realized, was sometimes not enough when privilege dictated who had access to better preparation. 

Even on the day of the exam, it still speaks for itself. 

“Even our commute to UP was to be hustled for due to the absurdly inconsiderate takers who clogged the roads with their private vehicles. The fact that people like us had to worry even for our transport and had already been stressed before exams serves only as the tip of the iceberg, as the more privileged students had a whole lot more time and comfort to learn,” Yuri lamented while he recalled his struggles while travelling for UP by through commute. 

There again, voices like Yuri’s continue to raise an overdue plea: “Para kanino ka ba talaga, UP?”

More than just an institution, UP has become a foundation of love. Along with that comes the weight of every story it has touched — every dream it has held, fulfilled, or left behind. For every name that appeared on the list, there are thousands more still wondering if they ever had a place. And yet, despite the heartbreaks and unanswered questions, the hope remains. These young dreamers continue to believe that, someday, the system will grow to be more equitable, humane, and much more open to those who need it most. 

The path to UP is a road full of uncertainties, whether it be surprising or heartbreaking. Despite the multiple challenges, it never fails to impart the same lesson to all those who try to venture into it: that amidst all hardship, you will make it out alive, and sometimes stronger than before. 

Like the old saying, “Rejection only means redirection,”  paves the way for numerous opportunities and life-long realizations. Whether it be a reflection of the path one initially hoped for or even the societal system that surrounds them, the university serves as a reflection of sacrifice and determination, and a source of love and hope for every single student who aspires or looks back to it.

There is indeed a love that remains with us forever, a love full of dreams and hopes and wishes of lives we could have lived. For those who were unlucky to get in, this love may haunt them forever. But at the end of the day, the dreaming does not end with “Thank You.” 

Regardless of the results, UP is not the end of everything.